Indeed, many young people do not feel that good about themselves. I would be the last to deny this. Mind you, the majority do feel OK, but if one in five indicates that things are not going well, this group should not be neglected. As was recently summarized in the Flemish JOP-monitor:

In summary, we can conclude that most Flemish youngsters judge their lives positively and feel good. On the other hand, there is also a small but significant minority who are dissatisfied with their lives and struggle with negative feelings.

But what is the cause of these negative feelings? Or better yet, what are the possible causes? In recent years, various possible explanations have passed by. Social media is currently a popular explanation, but also the many crises that our young people are confronted with, from the economic to the pandemic and climate crisis to the current wars. Also mentioned are increased attention and the lack of free play in childhood. In Flanders, one of the best predictors of not feeling good about yourself with our young people is being part of a non-intact family, although breaking up as a couple and remaining friends can more than compensate for this.

And what about school? You could argue that school rather inherits well-being from outside. The good news is that school often does not make it worse on average but does not necessarily make it better.

The proposition that raising the bar for our children and young people could lead to even more mental problems is not illogical but deserves some nuance. For example, the causal relationship between well-being, motivation, and learning is much more complex than just feeling good about learning.

You can also feel so good that you don’t want to do anything for the rest of the day. Do you really think that the majority of our young people when they say “I feel fantastic” then say: “And now I’m going to school”?

At the same time, learning something can give you an excellent feeling. That aha-erlebnis or epiphany, that one sudden insight, finally being able to do something, can be incredibly motivating. It is the secret behind many games. Games are not just fun. They are frustratingly fun.

Learning can help well-being, but this does not apply to all students. If you are too far away, learning will be more difficult. Fortunately, this is a minority that needs appropriate support. For most others, learning is, therefore, just a means to increase well-being.

But what if the pressure gets too high? High expectations are currently an important theme in education. We know that these can lead to more learning, motivation, and possibly a better feeling. But if the pressure gets too high, and there are unrealistic expectations, then learning will stop. It is about a delicate balance. That is why high expectations are not necessarily translated into high grades but into raising the bar for yourself. Knowing that you can do more and be challenged enough. Maybe not the best, but certainly becoming the better version of yourself.

Perhaps the Gruuthuse family and the Jesuits were correct in their motto: plus est en vous (There’s more in you), also one of the recipes for improving mental well-being.